WayfaringStrangers

Summertime...you are lovely and tiring and warm. Yesterday was the first official day of summer, but it's been warm and the kids have been out of school for a month now, so it feels familiar at this point. Today the air is humid and the sky looks like it might host one of those wonderful summer thunderstorms. I took the 3 boys for a walk in the woods this morning and it was perfect: that earthy woods smell was strong and we all breathed it all in. And then we got eaten by mosquitoes. The sun has been going down late and up early with the summer solstice and so the kids seem to go to bed later and wake up too early. That, on top of their relentless energy , million demands (not that every demand is always met), and a baby that is up at night nursing, is why my blog has been quiet. Writing is hard right now, as is showering, exercising, and sometimes eating. I do tend to prioritize eating though. Basically any alone time I have is very limited and I'm stretched thin. What hav...

There once was a me, who wanted to be a mother, deep down in my soul. So I found me a man and in a few years we planned to begin our parenting role. Three boys in 5 years, full of joy (and some tears) mean my house is never neat. But that doesn't matter, except when there's splatter of pee on the toilet seat. Now let me be clear, I'm happy to cheer about the joy of motherhood. They're gifts from above and there's plenty of love. The days are hard, but I know they're good. Amidst baseballs and sand, with coffee in hand, I navigate through the long day. Many times they go pee and I don't want to see, "Don't make a mess on the seat!" I say. But at the end of the day, when boys have been put away, and I think I won't have to repeat... I usually find-and then lose my mind- that there's pee on the toilet seat.

Since the preschool the boys go to is over for the summer, I decided we needed to keep some structure in our summer days. And so, Trader Preschool was invented.   I did most of the planning while I had help after Sammy was born. Now, before anyone thinks I'm some sort of organized, fun mom, please know that we are doing this: 1. for our sanity 2. as easily as possible. "Preschool" lasts about an hour a day, 4 days a week and it's mostly reading books and playing a few games. I thought up some themes, pinned a few crafts (I hate crafts), and bought a calendar for Circle Time. The official schedule is- 1. Tidy Up 2. Bible Time 3. Circle Time 4. Activity (Usually a game like Red Light, Green Light. Something to get them moving). 5. Workbook time (mostly for G) 6. Snack 7. Craft I'm also planning a lot of outings (all the parks, playdates, beach, strawberry picking, etc) to keep our days full. They are so energetic and need that! I'm also enforci...

It had been a long day. I had worked hard to keep the kids engaged- books, games, a walk, playing outside. I was tired from the heat, interrupted nights of sleep, and just the general maintenance of my home and children. I stood at the kitchen sink cleaning up dinner, a dinner that I'd made from scratch and then eaten in segments, interrupted by everyone's needs and a baby feeding session. "Mom," Graham asked, "will you play ball with me?" "No, my hands are busy. And I'm tired. I'm just about done for the day." I answered, a little bluntly. "Aw, you're boring!" he whined. I couldn't believe it. What in the world?? Didn't he consider all that I'd done, all that I do every day? I was anything but boring. Why was he so ungrateful? I turned to snap at him. And then, the Spirit pricked my heart. How many countless times am I complaining, asking for MORE, and ungrateful to my heavenly Father? Every day. Every m...

Samuel is a little over a month old now. He's growing fast, already up to 9 lbs, 7 oz. The overall adjustment of life is going well. Yesterday was Graham's last day of school and his PreK graduation (that deserves it's own post) so now... I'm home all day with the 3. I didn't get much 'rest' after Sammy was born. How could I? Even with help...there's so much to do, and the boys are so active. And so, I quickly found myself in the normal routine, just now with a baby along. I press forward, coffee in hand. Since school is over, today was the perfect day to hit up the library with all 3. Graham hasn't been in a while because I usually go with Patrick while G is at school. The library went really well! The big boys are mature enough to actually play well and not run off. Baby slept in his carseat the whole time. Afterward, we decided to go for a walk in the trail next to the library. It's paved, and Graham rode his bike and Patrick rode his sc...

"It's all enchanted and wild, just like my heart said it was gonna be..." -Nickel Creek

I posted this picture on facebook the other day: A long-time friend said it looked "just right." As in, me with 3 kids was a good fit. I take that as a huge compliment. And the good news is, I feel the same. As I was walking down the street with the 3 boys a few days ago, I thought, 'This is my gang. It's the perfect little group.' I don't mean that there can't be room for more, but right now, this feels right. I'm relieved to be feeling this way. I don't bond with my kids very well in pregnancy. Sure, I'm excited. I like the kicks (until they hurt). But pregnancy, as beautiful and miraculous as it is, isn't my favorite. I don't talk to my babies in utero, I don't sing or read to them. I don't even really think about what they'll look like. But the minute they're in my arms, I feel all the feelings.  With this baby, I had some nerves. G and P are a ton of work...I was kind of scared how we'd make it work with ...