WayfaringStrangers

It's one of "those" posts...I'm a jumbled mess and just trying to type out all the feelings and thoughts. I am tired. Patrick wiggled his way into our bed at some dark o'clock. He kissed me and then laid quietly. I looked at the clock: 5 a.m. "Oh good," I thought, "he'll go back to sleep." 5:15: He's still laying awake. "He will go back to sleep." 5:25: Still awake. "5 a.m. cannot be his wake up time." 5:40: Still awake. "5 a.m. cannot be his wake up time." 5:55: Still awake. "I feel like death..." 6:10: Now he's whispering about cheerios. 6:15: Thankfully Behn got up with him. 6:16: Graham wiggles into bed with me. And so. I am tired. I am also 2 days away from my 3rd trimester, which is another tiring factor. Growing humans is serious business, folks. I am full on waddling now, and had quit all my part time jobs because I just can't anymore. I feel fairly depleted and yet ...

A few weeks ago, our first little guy turned FIVE! Oh, Graham, where do I begin? Little G, as we call him sometimes, is such a smart, fun kid. He has really grown up this past year and thrived in preschool, t-ball, self-care, and friendships. He asks the most interesting questions, brain always turning, and is well-spoken. He has an impeccable memory. While he does fight with Patrick a lot- they have such a rivalry- he's  very loyal to those he loves and I've never seen a little boy more tender with his baby cousins.  More and more he asks spiritual questions, and we feel we see his heart working for the Lord. He's still a challenge in a lot of ways. He's smart and energetic and seems to need to be constantly doing something. Kind of like a German Shepherd. He is very silly (too much at school sometimes!) but a natural leader. He reminds me so much of my brother Isaac, who has a similar personality. I only pray all of this personality and his gifts are used to ...

A sunrise last week. I've seen many sunrises lately, due to one certain early bird who is 4 years old and thinks it a good idea to be up at 6..or 5...or 4:30...But each new day is grace. Last week, Patrick graduated to a toddler bed. I'd been looking at thrift stores for a while, but hadn't found one. Then I spotted a friend selling one on good ol' Facebook and jumped on it. I saw the ad at 4:30 in the afternoon, picked it up at 6:00, and by 7:30, my baby was a-sleeping on it. He loves it and transitioned perfectly. It was a little bittersweet, the taking the down the crib. But I must admit, I feel a bit giddy about it. The last few years of babies and now toddlers and preschoolers- they've been hard. Way hard. They've stretched me and grown me and aged me. I love having little ones, and yet I'm so thrilled about new autonomy, like Preschool and toddler beds and wiping their own bottoms (well, Graham at least). That's not to say I'll nev...

Last night we turned on some footage of the first hours and weeks of Graham's life. He was tiny. He was adored. We held him in awe. We grinned over every coo. He was, is, precious to us. Behn looked 10 years younger. I truly had a 'glow.' I looked impossibly young, almost like a teenager (I was almost 27). I think we were both just a lot less tired. I can nearly cry thinking of the simplicity of those sweet days, all cozied up in our little home in the most beautiful place in the world. Fast forward 4 years. Graham is so big- tall and healthy and athletic. He's funny and smart. He runs and jumps all day, knows the 7 continents, the planets, can draw shapes and doodles maps, and pretends to throw bombs at pirates. He's still obsessed with balls. He builds marble runs with his engineer's mind. He has a dimple on his right cheek when he grins. But. But these have been the hardest months of my life. People say 2 is bad, 3 is worse. Not to be negative, but 3 w...

Patrick's Birth Patrick Turns 1 Another year, and my littlest boy is now 2. It's funny to think  that 2 years ago I was holding a tiny baby in my arms after a crazy birth. It feels like a long time ago. Patrick is an optimistic, amiable person. He's just so easy to love and laugh with. He's a great brother to Graham: they play and wrestle and laugh and fight. They complement one another perfectly, a God-given bond. Patrick is a tractor-truck-bulldozer lover. If it has wheels, he likes it. He also loves sports, especially hockey. We gave him 2 hockey books as his gift and he asked us to read them over and over. Patrick is a good eater, and other than being an early-riser, a good sleeper. He's so active and can talk very well. He pretty much uses some complete (short) sentences and can tell us what he needs and even make jokes. Patrick is fearless and I often find him perched on high furniture. He's also tiny but fast.  And he copies everything  Graham says ...

Something happened over the weekend...I turned 30! It was a nice, calm thing to happen and no, I don't "feel" any different- just grateful for my 30 years so far, thankful for my parents, siblings, husband, kids, and friends. It was a sweet, quiet weekend. Behn took a 1/2 day on Friday so we could go get lunch and then he watched the kids so I could get my haircut (long overdue) and then I went out shopping with my mom. Fun day! Saturday night my family came over (including my sister Hannah and her husband Ben) and we had pizza, played a game, and hung out til late in the night. It was a perfect evening. But this post is not about my birthday, but about something else. Waking up early. You see, I've always been a Morning Person. Don't hate, it's just the way I was made. I've been known to wake up early just to see the sunrise. I love breakfast. The quiet of the mornings is my favorite part of the day. Everything is fresh and new. A few years ago, I had...

Last Sunday, Graham turned 3! Three years ago, our little guy came to be with us. On a snowy night, a fast labor, the pain, the excitement, and then- there he was. All cone headed and in our arms. He's a serious one, but more silly lately. His first word was 'ball' and we still hear that word more than any other. A lover of basketballs, ping pong balls, tennis balls, racquetballs, golf balls, and especially baseballs. He has quite the left handed throw, and a fascination with Babe Ruth. He speaks in full sentences and tells us jokes. "Patrick is a potato! Hahaha! Is that funny?" He is potty trained and even makes it through the night now without an accident. He can recite nearly all of Psalm 100. He prays at night, thanking God for all the things. For his family and bathtime and popcorn and his baseball glove. He pushes and hits and says 'it's mine!' because he is a 3 year old boy but he also asks if someone is ok or gets worried if so...

I'm tired and so are my babes (they are napping now); morning came much too early today. Patrick was up and cuddling with us at 5:45 and then he cried for Behn when Behn went to go make his bottle (Patrick has recently become a Daddy's boy). Crying commenced at 6:15 and lasted approx 2 minutes, which means Graham was also cuddling in bed with us at around 6:17. Then it was waffles and all that hulabaloo. However, I decided it's time for me to stop being a lame-o mom and to finally write a quick post about our baby  turning 1! I have decided I am not the party planning mom. It's just too stressful. Even when I decide it's going to be 'low-key' and 'small,' there's still stress. We decided to have a picnic at a playground in my parents' neighborhood. We invited family and a few close friends. It was a gorgeous day! And I had so many people to help out, which was great when I was cutting the fruit for lunch at 11:02 (party started at 11). An...